Part-Time Father (Harlequin Presents) Page 8

  ‘Like who?’ she enquired faintly.

  ‘Like your mother?’

  ‘No,’ she whispered, from between dry lips. ‘She—doesn’t know.’

  ‘I see,’ he said grimly.

  ‘Harrison…’ Her voice tailed off.

  ‘What?’

  ‘You won’t tell her? Please don’t tell her!’ she begged as the pain swamped her again.

  ‘Tell her? Why should I? It’s nothing to do with me.’ His grey eyes were penetrating as he stared down at her. ‘Is it, Kimberley?’

  ‘No.’ She shut her eyes, afraid that her fears and her feelings might show. He hadn’t asked. Amazing. But the baby was early, and perhaps he… he…thought. Tears threatened to well at the bitter thought. Why should he suspect that she was having his baby? He probably thought that he was only one of a long line of lovers in her life.

  Forcing herself, she opened her eyes and looked up at him. ‘Can I have some water, please?’

  He frowned. ‘I don’t know whether you should.’

  ‘Why not?’

  ‘Well, if they have to give you an anaesthetic——’

  ‘For God’s sake!’ Alarmed, Kimberley sat boltupright, her hair snaking wildly down her back. ‘I’m only having a baby—why should they want to give me——?’

  ‘Shh,’ he soothed her. ‘We’ll compromise.’ He disappeared into the kitchen and returned with a clean towel and a bowl of cool water, with which he proceeded to dampen her lips.

  ‘Oh!’ She smiled up into his eyes. ‘That’s good.’

  He gave her a strange smile and nodded, but he didn’t speak, just continued to dab at her dry lips every two seconds.

  They heard the siren long before the ambulance screeched up outside the front door, and Kimberley tried and failed to stand up.

  ‘Stay there!’ ordered Harrison. ‘They’ll send a wheelchair for you.’

  ‘Such a fuss,’ she mumbled, until she discovered that the wheelchair was infinitely preferable to walking.

  ‘She’s going to be all right, isn’t she?’ demanded Harrison, and the ambulanceman gave him a reassuring smile.

  ‘Don’t worry, sir—she looks fit enough to me. In my experience it’s always the father who goes to pieces! You’ll have a healthy baby son or daughter before you know it, sir!’

  She knew what conclusion they’d jumped to. She wanted to tell them that Harrison wasn’t the father, but now they were putting a mask over her face, telling her to breathe deeply, and the sickly sweet smell of gas was making her feel disorientated, making the pain retreat, become bearable.

  ‘Can you get in the back, please, sir?’

  Harrison climbed in beside her, some dark and unfathomable emotion on his face as he stared down at her.

  ‘What are you doing?’ she asked in bewilderment.

  ‘I’m coming with you,’ he stated.

  ‘Harrison——’

  ‘You can’t be on your own,’ he said in a voice which brooked no argument. ‘I’m staying.’

  She stared up at that strong, beautiful face, found herself wanting to touch it, to tell him…Not just about the baby, to tell him that…She reached her hand out and he gripped it. ‘Harrison,’ she whispered, but then another contraction, stronger and more intense than any of the preceding ones, made her pupils dilate in pain, and the ambulanceman put a finger over his lips.

  ‘Don’t talk! Concentrate on your breathing,’ he said urgently. ‘And say a prayer that the traffic’s quiet!’

  The ambulance pulled away—the driver obviously had his foot down—and the journey all became a blur to Kimberley. She was aware of little other than the bands of contraction, which became fiercer and stronger and closer together. She was aware of gripping Harrison’s hand, with her nails digging into his flesh so tightly that he should have winced, but he didn’t wince, just gently smoothed the sweat-soaked strands of black hair which fell over her cheek from time to time. I must look absolutely awful, thought Kimberley fleetingly.

  By the time they reached St Christopher’s, Kimberley was past caring what she looked like, or even what was happening. They were bundling her on a stretcher and travelling upwards in a lift and then into a room which looked less like a ward than somebody’s bedroom. It was all part of the new, relaxed policy towards birth, remembered Kimberley as Harrison helped lift her on to a flowersprigged bed. She recognised one of the midwives she’d seen at her hospital appointments, who now began to examine her.

  ‘Please,’ Kimberley gasped. ‘Can I have an epidural now?’

  The midwife laughed. ‘An epidural? Oh, heavens no, dear—it’s far too late for that.’

  ‘Too late?’

  ‘Why, yes—the baby’s on its way now. Keep breathing the way you’ve been taught, and any minute now I’m going to ask you to start pushing.’

  Pain swamped her; someone wiped her brow and Kimberley looked up to see Harrison’s darkly handsome face swimming into view.

  ‘Harrison——’ she said weakly, but he shook his head.

  ‘Don’t talk. Save your strength for the baby. It’s all right—I’m here and I’m not leaving you.’

  Oh, if only. The face swam away again. It was too late to tell him now. She felt a desire to push which consumed her…She saw the midwife’s encouraging nod…Minutes later the baby was born and immediately gave a lusty cry.

  ‘It’s a girl!’ said Harrison softly, bending his head to speak in her ear. ‘A beautiful baby girl.’

  And Kimberley burst into tears.

  They laid the baby on her breast and Kimberley experienced the strangest, strongest sensation, of being physically exhausted and yet wonderfully, powerfully strong and triumphant.

  ‘And Daddy can hold her in a minute,’ smiled the midwife.

  Kimberley said nothing, just stared down at the black little head which nestled against her. Too confusing to try to explain. Certainly not now.

  ‘She’s a fine healthy girl,’ said the midwife. ‘And a good weight, too—considering that she’s early.’ She smiled at Kimberley. ‘Have you changed your mind about the adoption, now that you’re back with the baby’s daddy?’

  The world spun on its axis.

  Kimberley glanced up to find a pair of perceptive grey eyes, suddenly gone as cold as an arctic sky, boring into hers. He knows, she thought, with a sudden flash of insight. He knows he’s the baby’s father.

  ‘Adoption?’ he queried softly.

  The midwife was beginning to look confused; perhaps things were not all they seemed with this striking-looking couple, she thought. Embarrassed, she turned away and began to wash her hands at the sink.

  ‘Adoption?’ he repeated, and there was a frozen look of rage on his face.

  Words failed her. Literally. She gave a gulping speechless nod.

  There was no way out. Not now. ‘Yes,’ she told him, lifting her chin defiantly. ‘I intend to have the baby adopted.’

  ‘I see,’ he said, in a voice so sombre that Kimberley’s skin turned to ice.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  KIMBERLEY didn’t know what she had expected to happen—but what she had not expected was that cold and terse little nod he gave her.

  ‘I’ll let you get some rest now,’ he said abruptly. ‘I’ll be back later.’

  It was like a sentence of death hanging over her head. Kimberley fed the baby, and they both slept. They gave her a cup of strong tea and a marmalade sandwich, then she had a wash, and the staff nurse washed and brushed her hair for her.

  ‘Got to look pretty for your boyfriend,’ she said to Kimberley confidingly. ‘I can’t keep the student nurses away—they’re dying to see him again. What a hunk—are there any more like him at home?’

  Kimberley tried to smile, and failed. Her lip wobbled precariously and the staff nurse nodded understandingly.

  ‘Feeling a bit blue, are we? Don’t worry, dear.’ She plumped the four pillows into shape behind Kimberley’s back. ‘It’s quite normal to feel like that afterwards.’ S
he beamed down at the sleeping infant. ‘Decided what to call her yet, have you?’

  Kimberley swallowed. She had discussed this with her doctor. Apparently it didn’t matter what name she called her baby, because the adoptive parents would probably change it. She stared down at the crib. So, even though she might call her Georgia or Alicia—two names she liked very much—her daughter might instead grow up as an Anne or a Mary.

  She must have dozed off, because when she awoke it was to find Harrison there, at the end of the bed. He was studying the child intently, an expression of rapt preoccupation on his face, but he seemed to sense that Kimberley’s eyes had opened, for he glanced up immediately and a coldly indifferent look chilled his face.

  ‘Harrison’ she began, but he stopped her with

  one decisive shake of his dark head, an expression of distaste curving his mouth scornfully.

  ‘Save it.’ He spoke tersely. ‘I don’t want any more of your lies. She’s mine, isn’t she?’

  ‘Harrison——’

  ‘Isn’t she?’

  Dispiritedly Kimberley sank back against the pillows. ‘Yes. She’s yours.’

  It was as though her spoken admission, even though he had known it to be a fact, had shocked him to the core. He stared first at Kimberley—and the look of naked pain and anger and hatred in his eyes scorched her to the very core—then shook his head very slowly from side to side, as though he couldn’t really take it in.

  ‘But you knew all along, didn’t you?’ she asked weakly. ‘Why didn’t you say something?’

  His mouth became a grim, harsh line. ‘You may have a low opinion of me, Kimberley, but I’m not in the habit of debating paternity when a woman is in labour.’ A muscle began to work furiously beneath one perfect cheekbone. ‘Just tell me,’ he said, in a strange, gritty voice, ‘tell me that you aren’t planning to have her adopted.’

  She heard the plea in his voice, and she couldn’t lie to him—but neither could she prevent her voice from shaking. ‘I—yes,’ she managed. ‘Yes, I am.’

  The look he gave her was one of pure contempt.

  ‘My God,’ he whispered in disbelief. ‘I thought that my opinion of you couldn’t possibly sink any lower, but I was wrong. It was bad enough when you traded my brother in because you fancied making a quick buck. But this…’ He shook his head. ‘This defies all comparison. What right did you have, Kimberley, to deny me all knowledge of the fact that I was going to have a child? Have a child.’ And his face softened marginally as his eyes strayed to the snuffling infant.

  Kimberley was fighting for her life—her sanity. ‘What right?’ she demanded, not caring who heard her. ‘You forfeited any right when you offered me that one night! A quick roll in the hay doesn’t automatically guarantee your rights! If you recall, you couldn’t wait to make sure that I’d actually used some contraception—and I’m ashamed to say that even the thought of it never occurred to me——’

  ‘Because you were so hot for me,’ he said insultingly.

  She knew that his need to wound her was deep, and that it stemmed from discovering that she had kept the secret of his paternity from him, but knowing that didn’t stop it hurting. ‘Yes, I was “hot” for you—as you so delightfully put it. I’m sure that’s nothing new, Harrison. You’re pretty good in bed.’

  He gave an angry snarl, his eyes sparked fire, but then, as if he was remembering just where they were, and that Kimberley had given birth less than four hours ago, he stopped himself from responding with what was obviously a huge effort.

  ‘Why should I have saddled you with a baby from what was never supposed to be anything more than a one-night stand?’

  He flinched, a muscle working frantically in his cheek. ‘You too,’ he answered coldly, ‘have such a delightful way with words.’

  She felt deflated. What was the point of all this?

  ‘May I hold her?’ he asked suddenly.

  Kimberley nodded, feeling tears prick at the back of her eyes as she watched him bend down and cradle the tiny bundle, before lifting her up to lie her on his shoulder, placing the large and soft shawl tenderly around her shoulders.

  He stood like that for a moment, completely unconscious of the striking picture he made, just gently rocking back and forth on his heels, and the baby gave a sigh. He was so tall, so strong—so powerfully masculine—and yet he was as gentle as a kitten with the baby. A student nurse stuck her head round the door and almost swooned, but his eyes narrowed by a fraction, he gave the tiniest shake of his head, and the nurse took the hint and scuttled off.

  ‘But the end result is the same,’ he said heavily, his eyes going reluctantly to Kimberley’s, and she blinked away the glittering tears which sparkled at the ice-blue depths. ‘What have you decided to call her?’

  ‘Can’t we talk about this some other time?’ she pleaded.

  He shook his head. ‘I’ve certainly no wish to tire you out. I won’t keep you long, and the whole business will be kept on a completely impartial basis.’

  What on earth was he talking about?

  ‘But I have to go abroad for a few days,’ he continued, ‘and we must get a few things settled before I go. Like her name.’ And he smiled into the soft, downy black head.

  Kimberley felt panicked. She had to tell him. She took a deep breath. ‘It doesn’t really matter what I’m going to call her,’ she reminded him gently. ‘Because I’m going to have her adopted.’

  There was a strange, frightening look on his face as he enunciated the single word. ‘Why?’

  ‘Because I don’t feel it would be fair—to keep her——’

  ‘Fair to whom?’ he interrupted coldly. ‘To you— or to her?’

  Kimberley tried to explain. ‘What chance would she have? Brought up by a single mother who has to go out to work to support her? I’d have to work late some nights—what then? Stuck at some childminder’s—her never seeing me, me never seeing her. And when I did I’d be too tired and——’

  ‘You selfish little liar! How dare you even consider it?’

  Kimberley exploded with rage. ‘How dare you?’ she demanded. ‘You talk about rights—what right do you have as a man to try and take some ridiculously moral stance on what I should do? If you must know, I thought I was doing the right thing by the baby. I thought two parents were better than one——’

  ‘But she has two parents,’ he pointed out.

  Kimberley stared at him. ‘Just what are you suggesting?’

  ‘I’m not suggesting anything at the moment, I’m merely stating a fact. But one thing is certain, Kimberley—I will not have my daughter put up for adoption, and I’ll fight you through every court in the land to stop you.’

  There was a whimpering at his shoulder, which rapidly gave way to a shrill shriek emitted by the widest mouth on such a tiny little creature that Kimberley could imagine.

  She held her arms out. ‘Give her to me.’

  The momentary hesitation on his face nearly killed her, but then he handed the baby over reluctantly, frowning slightly as he watched her suckle Kimberley immediately—the shriek becoming a blissful glug as the baby greedily drank the milk.

  Harrison moved towards the bed. Towering over it, he was at an advantage, and his grey eyes burned their ice-fire into hers. ‘I have to go abroad for a few days—there’s nothing I can do about it.’

  ‘It’s of no concern to me.’

  He shook his head. ‘Oh, but it is, Kimberley,’ he contradicted her. ‘It concerns you very much. Don’t even attempt to give the baby up. I shall instruct my lawyers to act for me at once—and don’t think it’s an idle boast when I tell you that you’ll have no case against me.’

  ‘Case?’ What was he talking about? ‘Just what are you planning to do?’

  ‘I’ll adopt her myself—that’s my plan. As you don’t want her. And one other thing—I want us to agree on a name before I go. I’m fed up with calling her “she” already.’ There was a pause. ‘Had you any names in mind?’

>   ‘Why consult me?’ she whispered brokenly. ‘I’m only her mother.’

  ‘And mothers fight to keep their children,’ he snarled. ‘Not give them away.’

  Kimberley bit her lip, not trusting herself to say anything.

  ‘So. Names?’

  ‘I like Georgia,’ she said reluctantly. ‘Or Alicia.’

  ‘I like Georgia, too,’ he said surprisingly. ‘I like it very much.’ The baby finished feeding and he was staring down at her, entranced. Quite instinctively Kimberley held her out to him.

  Without being told, he winded her and changed her nappy; he was brilliant for a beginner, Kimberley conceded, then she watched as he laid her carefully down in her crib and tucked the shawl round her.

  ‘Goodbye, sweet little Georgia,’ he said softly, and as he straightened from planting a kiss on the soft little cheek he said something else softly, too. Very softly—but Kimberley heard it. ‘Let’s hope you don’t grow up to be a lying little cheat like your mother.’

  And he walked out of the room without a backward glance, leaving Kimberley shaken and close to tears, and on the brink of a truth which had nagged at her and refused to leave her since the first time Georgia had lain on her breast and a tiny little hand had curled itself tightly around her finger.

  Her words had been empty, her thoughts wishful.

  She would move heaven and earth to keep her baby.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  KIMBERLEY and Georgia stayed in the hospital for five days. They told her that this was usual for firsttime mothers, particularly as the baby had been early.

  Kimberley had sent James out with a fortune to spend on baby clothes, delighting in the tiny garments he had brought back. She’d have to buy a pram, she knew, and a cot—countless things—but she’d wait until she was discharged and then go choose them herself.

  Two days after Harrison left for France a giant pink teddy bear had arrived, with a card saying, ‘To the most beautiful baby in the world. With love from Daddy’. And just the sight of it had filled Kimberley with an inexplicable fear.

  She was packing her suitcase to go home when he walked into the room. She was crouched over her suitcase wearing a broderie anglaise cotton shirt, which buttoned down the front so that she could breastfeed, and it came to mid-thigh. She saw the reluctant darkening of his eyes as his glance roved over her semi-clothed state and felt colour scorch her cheeks as she registered his physical presence, the impact he always made on her. Her breasts tingled, and she felt as though her body had completely betrayed her—for surely it wasn’t normal to ache and hunger for a man when you’d only just had his baby?